Monday, January 5, 2009

What I've been thinking about

Mostly, I have been thinking about growing up. When I went to grade school, there were several schools in the district. I just checked, they only have 5 there now, but that's not my story. My story is that I went to almost all the grade schools in that town. Even if there were only 5, that's still more than one a year. I was there only until 4th grade. Kindergarten was at it's own building. Anyway, then we moved when I was going into 5th grade. I went to two schools in 5th grade. We actually stayed in Lincoln, NE all the way until 8th grade. That was huge, of course we went to Jr. High so technically that's two schools. I begged not to move. My family left NE a couple months before I did. I got to stay with my grandparents for half of a semester. I moved to good old Kansas over winter break. I hated it. We moved to a small town from a big city. I had friends in Lincoln and a whole world that we all had conquered.

So anyway, towards the end of 8th grade, I had to go to a new school in a small town. Everyone knew everyone else and had known them since basically birth. That is not all that cool. Being the new kid sucks. If you have never been a new kid, believe me, I was the perpetual new kid, it sucks. No, people weren't mean or rude or anything, they just have this history. They've been going to each other's birthday parties since before kindergarten. Thinking back, I'm not so sure I went to any classmate birthday parties. Maybe they didn't have those in Hiawatha. Maybe we were too old and I didn't know. Sure, I did make friends, and ultimately, it wasn't a horrible place to grow up. Some of my best friends are from there and my husband is from Hiawatha.

But, what's bothering me is that I don't have NO one that I have a life long connection with. I see people from all over on facebook posting pictures of themselves with their friends from kindergarten and they are my age and older and are still friends with these people. Well, of course there are younger people that have life long friends, too.

So, my goal in my present life is to NOT move a million times and let my kids stay in the same area. There are positive aspects to moving so much. I'm really good with names and faces. I can observe all things from any angle and don't have to be involved in everything. I honestly don't care what's popular or what other people think about my choices. I'm also good at doing stuff fast (coming in the middle of a semester and still required to do all the work causes that one) and I can do it by myself.

Things I feel that I'm missing from moving so much really aren't as numerous now that I think about it. I do have a hard time getting comfortable enough to not be shy. For example, if I go somewhere new, I'm quiet, hang back and take it all in. People that I've known for a long time don't know this, they think I'm out going. Or if you met me when I was in one of my comfort zones you might think I'm fine. I don't have long term memories of many people. If I think of my best friends from Washington, I still think of them as my best friends. Sure, I added them as friends on Myspace, but I don't really KNOW them. Also, the last time I saw them was when I was 18, so they were too. Of course, now it seems like they should still be 18. Then my best friend from Lincoln. He's my friend on facebook. If I'm honest, I think of him as a 12 year old. Seriously, this was my best friend for 3 years. We were always together. I moved away and started over. He probably has other childhood friends that he continued to be friends with and is still friends with.

Anyway, what's everyone else think? Do you think moving around a lot is hard on a kid? Would you try not to move too much, or is it not a big deal? Like I said, I hope to stay put so our kids can just have the long term bonds. Also, did you move around a lot? How did you deal with it? I'm sure each personality handles each thing differently, I don't think my brother really cares that we moved so much, but I did.

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