Dreams

So, I was volunteering in the 5th grade classroom today. I do it every Monday afternoon. (I go to 1st grade in the mornings, they just didn't need me today.) While I'm sitting there, this boy asks me what's my dream. I must have looked blank because he then clarified it by saying, "What do you want from life, you know, your dream."

It's been about 2 hours since he asked me that question, and he continued with, "do you want to be a millionaire, do you want...." until the teacher told him to get back to work. Two hours later, I don't know the answer. When I was little, I wanted to be a doctor. Then I wanted to be a photographer, a musician, a football player for the Chicago Bears, a jedi (yes, the boy gets it from me), a ninja, a Marine or a SEAL, a bartender. Basically, there were a million things I wanted to be and most of them had nothing to do with any of the others. But, what about now. What do I want from life?

I think my life is pretty decent. Sure, more money would be awesome, but what's the trade off? Would I need a different job, or maybe a second job? I'm not willing to do that. What about jobs? Would I want a different job? Right now, I'm happy with my work. Sure, there are tons of things that I can't stand, but I've worked enough to know that all jobs have bad points. My job though, has so many good points, I'm not trading. Just the job part of it alone is great. I work 40 hours, have holidays, vacation, no weekends or evenings, and I only work 4 days! I like it. Also, they are really good about letting us have time off for kid functions if needed. Then, lets look at what I do all day. I teach. What's better than that. You get to experience the joy of learning every day. Sure, some days it could be just the fact that they finally figured out that if you stack big blocks on the bottom, a structure stands better than on little blocks, but that's fine. Then there is the potential you see with so many of the kids is amazing. I have one kid that is so enthralled with anything in the animal kingdom especially bugs. I can see him being a scientist. Also, as you teach, you learn. Thinking again about my budding scientist, this is especially true. He will find something and want to know what it is. We will do research to find out what it is and as much about it as possible. The main thing that he was researching was butterflies and moths during the summer.

Then there is family. My two kids can be a challenge, but they are a lot of fun that I wouldn't change for anything. I also have a great husband. Sure, they all make me crazy once in a while, but ultimately, they are awesome. AND they all put up with me.

So, while I may have given up on my "dreams", I'm sure I'll be fine.

What I've been thinking about

Mostly, I have been thinking about growing up. When I went to grade school, there were several schools in the district. I just checked, they only have 5 there now, but that's not my story. My story is that I went to almost all the grade schools in that town. Even if there were only 5, that's still more than one a year. I was there only until 4th grade. Kindergarten was at it's own building. Anyway, then we moved when I was going into 5th grade. I went to two schools in 5th grade. We actually stayed in Lincoln, NE all the way until 8th grade. That was huge, of course we went to Jr. High so technically that's two schools. I begged not to move. My family left NE a couple months before I did. I got to stay with my grandparents for half of a semester. I moved to good old Kansas over winter break. I hated it. We moved to a small town from a big city. I had friends in Lincoln and a whole world that we all had conquered.

So anyway, towards the end of 8th grade, I had to go to a new school in a small town. Everyone knew everyone else and had known them since basically birth. That is not all that cool. Being the new kid sucks. If you have never been a new kid, believe me, I was the perpetual new kid, it sucks. No, people weren't mean or rude or anything, they just have this history. They've been going to each other's birthday parties since before kindergarten. Thinking back, I'm not so sure I went to any classmate birthday parties. Maybe they didn't have those in Hiawatha. Maybe we were too old and I didn't know. Sure, I did make friends, and ultimately, it wasn't a horrible place to grow up. Some of my best friends are from there and my husband is from Hiawatha.

But, what's bothering me is that I don't have NO one that I have a life long connection with. I see people from all over on facebook posting pictures of themselves with their friends from kindergarten and they are my age and older and are still friends with these people. Well, of course there are younger people that have life long friends, too.

So, my goal in my present life is to NOT move a million times and let my kids stay in the same area. There are positive aspects to moving so much. I'm really good with names and faces. I can observe all things from any angle and don't have to be involved in everything. I honestly don't care what's popular or what other people think about my choices. I'm also good at doing stuff fast (coming in the middle of a semester and still required to do all the work causes that one) and I can do it by myself.

Things I feel that I'm missing from moving so much really aren't as numerous now that I think about it. I do have a hard time getting comfortable enough to not be shy. For example, if I go somewhere new, I'm quiet, hang back and take it all in. People that I've known for a long time don't know this, they think I'm out going. Or if you met me when I was in one of my comfort zones you might think I'm fine. I don't have long term memories of many people. If I think of my best friends from Washington, I still think of them as my best friends. Sure, I added them as friends on Myspace, but I don't really KNOW them. Also, the last time I saw them was when I was 18, so they were too. Of course, now it seems like they should still be 18. Then my best friend from Lincoln. He's my friend on facebook. If I'm honest, I think of him as a 12 year old. Seriously, this was my best friend for 3 years. We were always together. I moved away and started over. He probably has other childhood friends that he continued to be friends with and is still friends with.

Anyway, what's everyone else think? Do you think moving around a lot is hard on a kid? Would you try not to move too much, or is it not a big deal? Like I said, I hope to stay put so our kids can just have the long term bonds. Also, did you move around a lot? How did you deal with it? I'm sure each personality handles each thing differently, I don't think my brother really cares that we moved so much, but I did.

Anyway, the kids

All the time you read blogs about kids: Parenting blogs, homeschooling blogs, and just blogs that have random mentions of kids. Heck, you may even see blogs written by kids. I'm actually thinking of having my two start blogging. "Why?" you may ask. Well, there are a few reasons.

Last week we had parent teacher conferences. Amory's was first. Last year, we did his second so he felt vindicated this year. I didn't really know it was a competition, but if your kids are in the same school, you might think about it. Last year, we had a good conference and he was doing at or just above grade level in some things, and below grade level in writing. Let's just glaze over all the behavior issues. (I always write that word behaviour because it looks better all Canadian, but my firefox says it's wrong. Just like theatre is wrong.) Anyway, back to this year. We go in there expecting some of the same. I volunteer most of my day on Monday at the school. I'm in the 1st grade from 8:00-10:00 or 10:30. So, it's interesting that this kid who didn't know his letters before kindergarten, is a top reader! He is reading chapter books and I guess I didn't realize that wasn't normal. His sister was at that level at this age, so it's normal to us I guess. He's at grade level in math. I'd like him to do better at that, but he just doesn't like to sit still long enough to deal with it. Oh, and his behaviour isn't an issue this year. I don't know if it's because he has such great experienced teachers, or if it's him being better. I think a bit of both, probably. His teachers ARE excellent though. Anyway, what the main concern with him is writing. We need to catch his writing up with his reading. Again, I think it's mostly he doesn't want to sit still for it. He never colored as a preschooler. We tried getting him things he liked: spiderman, cars, trucks. Nothing worked. So, ultimately, I think his motor skills are behind. However, he can play video games like a maniac, so that slightly skews that theory. So, back to the blog idea. I was thinking of having him just write a few sentences here and there to encourage the writing process. It won't be HAND writing, so he may go for it. It will help with comprehension and getting thoughts to "paper". We'll see.

Now, on to the girl. She is very bright. However, she won't take risks. She does the minimal amount of work to get what she needs done. I've noticed lately, that means her sentences are very short and boring in most things. So, that's my goal for her. I'm going to try to get her to expand her thoughts a bit. I have no doubt this kid could be way better at most things if she just tries. She used to always be top of the class in reading, writing, math, pretty much everything. Now, she's NEAR the top I'm sure, but everyone else is catching up. I'm not saying average is bad. I'm saying EFFORT is good!

Frustrated

I am about to blog something that is going to seem unpatriotic especially at this time of year. However, I feel that the use of free thought and saying what you want IS as American as you can get. If you don't USE your rights, what's all the fighting for anyway?

My frustration is a 5th grade social studies test. The kid got a C which isn't bad, but isn't great. I looked over the test just to see what was going on. There were some errors that I totally understand marking down; they were only partial answers. That accounts for 5 points. What really bothers me is the multiple choice.

1. Why is the motto E Pluribus Unum a good saying?
a. Many people spoke Latin.
b. Coins display this saying.
c. Out of many states, one country was formed.
d. Americans share many ideals.

What would you answer? Could it be argued that it's not a good saying? Out of many, one. I have to admit that I haven't read the propaganda, I mean text book, to see what the answer that is expected. I have taken enough tests to guess that a teacher would probably say that D is the real answer. But, A is valid in that many more people DID speak latin, but it wasn't a universal language, so I would guess that's a flaw of that answer. B isn't good. It was on the coins after it became ONE of the mottos on the great seal that was approved in 1782 (first on coins in 1786). If you look on wikipedia (which is of course what I did) you will see that originally, the thought WAS C. That is what the kid answered and I can see the thought process to that. We are 50 states (and even then we were more than one state) coming together to make ONE nation. Many forms one. Sounds like the saying to me. Then there is D. I'm not 100% sure if that is the real answer, but it would have to be. However, we do NOT share ideals in this country. That is actually part of what makes us great. We can all think what we want. I think this question wasn't great.

Now this next one is the one that will get people mad at me. It's almost like I'm Obama running around without a freaking flag on my lapel.

Why is the Pledge of Allegiance important?
a. It shows our varied population.
b. It teaches us to memorize sayings.
c. It shows we have a strong country.
d. It tells the basic ideals Americans share.

Now, I KNOW I can argue that it's NOT important. It's not. Some people don't even say it at school. They really don't. Let's look these answers to the "pledge" question, right after I make a short tangent about the history of it. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the United States of America and to the republic for which it stands, one nation under god, indivisible, with liberty and justice for all. This pledge was written for the most part in 1892 as a part of Columbus day celebrations. We won't start yet another tangent on my thoughts on THAT. The original author was a Baptist minister, yet he didn't put the god part in. He did feel it was a way to show solidarity. Interestingly, the other part that was changed was that he said "my flag" instead of "the flag of the United States of America". Then there is the under god issue that was added in the height of a war with Korea AND Germany. Have you ever noticed how all that propaganda comes out when there is some sort of turmoil.

But, regardless of all that, back to the question. A - it shows our varied population. Obviously that's not the right answer. I can't even twist that one to make it fit. Then B says it teaches us to memorize sayings. I have to be honest and say that right there is my answer. I contend that it's not philosophically important so I'll say if it has importance it would have to be so I can memorize something. I personally like mnemonics for memorization, but that's me. Next is C which states it shows we have a strong country. Go back and read the pledge again. This is ONE nation (be it under god or not) INDIVISIBLE... That's pretty darn tough. It can't be divided (reminds me of a song by Sham 69). Sounds like a decent answer to me. And finally D states it tells the basic ideals Americans share. I honestly don't think that. I think some people think this. But there are those that feel the that pledging to the flag is idolatry. (On a side note, I've thought this since I was a kid and remember getting in trouble at a young age for questioning this and the cross symbol. Maybe I was a Jehovah's Witness in a past life. I don't agree with all they have to say, but that's one thing I do agree that is biblically valid -not stating the what I feel about the bible either, but if you are saying you believe the bible, you might rethink how you feel about idolatry.) Then of course there are those that feel that this should not be considered one nation under god. So, people with this belief wouldn't share the ideals with people that do. With liberty and justice for all. THAT is an ideal for all of us, but different people feel differently about what that means. Wiki the word liberty. And justice? Justice for ALL. I'm willing to bet if you even think for a second, you can think of many injustices around you at any given time. Sure it's IDEAL to have these qualities, but I don't think all Americans share ALL the ideals in the pledge.

What is the correct answer you may ask. I don't think my answer of B is the right one. I know it's not C because that's what the kid wrote and she got it wrong. It would by default be D. I guess if the book says it is it must be. I just don't agree is all.

Here's the question for those that took the time to read this insane rambling: What to do. I found out that my child is not the only one to do poorly on this test. Do I let it go knowing it's the first test, the kids will get used to it, 5th grade is harder. Do I contact the teacher and if so say what? Obviously, this diatribe is for me to blow off steam. I need to be more assertive rather than aggressive if I contact the teacher. I CAN do that, but it wouldn't have helped with my frustration to talk nicely right now, but I CAN. Or should I save up my anger and write to the text book company? I could do that, but seriously I doubt that would do any good.

Done for now.

First day of school.

Today was the first day back for the grade school kids! I hope this means I'll be writing more as I'm a huge slacker. Oh well.

High School

So, there is this article in the local paper that has me thinking back. It's about band uniforms. It made me think about the uniforms we wore in high school band. Then, it got me wondering. What did everyone else do in high school?

Like I mentioned, I was in band. My favorite part was marching band. I was also in jazz band, percussion ensemble, and of course concert band was part of it. I also was on swim team. Swim team started when I was a little kid. I think I was about 10 when I started swim team. I did state in Nebraska for u12 one year. Placed 17th in backstroke (my worst thing) and that's it. I didn't place in anything else. It was fun though. I still love swimming. It's great exercise, I just wish I could get myself to the pool in the winter. I'm just too tired to get there. It's one of those things where you KNOW exercise is good for you and will liven you up, but you just have to get there first. I also ran track (sprints) all four years, but I sucked at that. Anyway, I think that's about all I did. I did volleyball freshman year and didn't really like it. I did cross country senior year for about a week. I was never supposed to run distance. Seriously, that's insane! Oh, something I did that isn't common knowledge, I did Miss TEEN Kansas when I was a junior. It was interesting. Even then it wasn't my thing, but what the heck, gotta try new things.

So, what did you do in high school? Do you miss it?

The weekend

So, Saturday was busy. We found out a church was handing out backpacks with supplies to kids in K-6th. We went there and of course it was packed, but the kids got their backpacks. Amory wanted a character bag though, so he was happy to get stuff, but wanted a different bag. Since we saved money, I agreed, and he's giving his to a friend that has a bag that's all torn up. Anyway, it's his first year, he should have a bag he loves! He ended up getting a star wars backpack. He's all packed and ready.

After that, we had to take the dogs to the vet to get their stitches removed. Smokey, the bigger dog was NO problem. Flipped him over, snip, snip, done. Zeus, the min-pin, only had one stitch, but my goodness, that little shit was hard to hold down. Then, it turns out, when he was there for the surgery and boarding, they forgot to do his shots. So, we had that ordeal too.

We came home, and headed to target. My kids think that target is the pinnacle of fine dining. Seriously, they BEG to eat at target. So, we eat, and look at school supplies. There were a few things they didn't have in the bags. And, we picked up the star wars backpack. We thought about going to wal-mart too, but we went home. We did end up at walmart later and picked up the very last things for school supplies. Both kids also got binders even though they don't need them. But, they pay for those with their allowance. The mean mom that I am, I made Corey pay for her spirals too. I will pay the $.10 it costs for a plain one, but the $2 it costs for Corbin Bleu, she has to pay. She got a few plain and 3 "fancy" ones. She's happy.

Sunday, my mom took us school clothes shopping. I got Amory some converse all stars for $11. There was one pair and they were his size. I was NOT leaving them in the store. Anyway, we ate lunch at JR's place GREAT food. We got tons of stuff. Came home and relaxed. I did go to bed a bit early.

Today, we hope to run around downtown, but the darn kids won't wake up!